


Investment

by Ailette



Category: Avengers (Comics), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Imported, M/M, Talk of Sex Toys, games night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-28
Updated: 2014-08-28
Packaged: 2018-02-15 03:54:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2214828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ailette/pseuds/Ailette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's games night at Avengers Tower.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Investment

Tony Stark was considered a genius, even though many people forgot about the fact that he was also, at core, a business man. It was never good if you forgot something like that.

Steve had learned and re-learned that fact many times over the years, but he was still caught by surprise when it happened. Re-learning again.

It started, harmless enough, with Jan entering the living room wearing a Captain America t-shirt one day. He should have known something was going to happen when Tony asked her where she’d bought it and then smiled his most innocent and sweet smile at Steve, going back to reading his book.

He hadn’t been aware of it over the years, only distantly noticing people wearing clothes with his shield imprinted on them. It was when he started seeing earrings and bracelets, shoes and key chains with ‘Captain America’ as a logo that he started to get uncomfortable. He asked Jarvis about it, but the only response was a calm,

“Oh, but there are many things with superheroes’ names available, sir. I’m sure you’ve seen some of the Spider-Man ones already?”

And he had. So there was no need to worry, right? He didn’t think about it again until the new Avengers had come together for a quiet (even though it was everything but) games night at the tower, and he and Peter sat next to each during Monopoly. He wondered briefly who even suggested this game, before he caught Tony’s eyes, gleefully shining in the soft light of the lamp above the table. Of course.

Since there was no real question who’d win, he didn’t particularly concentrate and instead started chatting with Peter, who’d lost everything after the first five rounds and unsuccessfully tried to get back in the game by bargaining his Spider-Man chucks for fake money.

“Its amazing people make those all by themselves,” Steve said, nodding at the shoes in appreciation of the handiwork. Peter frowned at him.

“If by people you mean employees in big, big factories and sales persons in Wal-Mart, then I guess you’re right.” Seeing the utterly confused expression on Cap’s face, Peter looked around in search of help, but the rest of the team (sans Bob and plus MJ) was still immersed in buying streets and building houses. “Er, I might not be the best person to explain this to you, but usually, someone holds the rights to a brand name, in this case the alias a superhero uses, and they produce all kinds of items under the name. Apparently, you can make a lot of money when you possess, say, Captain America. I’m just glad Danny bought me off the streets years ago,” he stopped as Luke started snickering. “That came out sounding very homoerotic and _wrong_.”

Steve ignored the jest and thoughtfully cocked his head. “How do I find out who holds my name? I mean, as far as I know there’s no strange things that have been done with it, but I’d like to make sure there never will be.”

Left from him, Logan snorted, loudly. “No strange things? Have ya never been to a se—Nah, of course ya haven’t.”

Steve stared at him in confusion. He was about to ask when his eyes fell on Tony who–very uncharacteristically—was struggling very hard to keep up his poker face. He narrowed his eyes. “Tony,” he growled warningly, knowing full well his partner had done something to warrant the tone.

“Mmh?” At the badly faked innocent expression, all eyes wandered to Tony who seemed oblivious.

“What did you do?”

Iron Man tried—and trying was really all you could call it—to look offended, before he held up his hands in mock surrender, grinning like the evil mastermind he could have easily become. “Alright, alright. Don’t look at me like that! I just happen to know who owns the rights to your name.”

Logan sniffed audibly, narrowing his eyes at Tony. “Ya’re not telling us everything, Stark.”

Tony’s grin got wider, seemingly about to reach his ears. “Well, _I_ own the rights to your name,” he made a dramatic pause to give Steve the time for a surprised gasp, but was thrown off his guard when Luke suddenly chipped in.

“You own him, too? Man, how many people did you buy? Danny only mentioned you recently got the rights for the Sentry and Spider-Woman.”

A little sheepish, Tony ducked his head. “I thought it’d be better if the new team of Avengers couldn’t get officially made into voodoo dolls or something.”

“Wait. You own the whole team?” MJ asked, sitting up straight. “Except for Peter and Luke?”

All Tony could do was nod before Luke got his next question in. “Aren’t you incurring loss with Wolverine?” The X-Man growled at him and Peter could have sworn he heard a distinct ‘Snikt!’ but Luke completely ignored the mutant.

“No, actually I’m making a nice bit of money with the X-Men’s rights. People hate them in America, of course. But their action figures are a hit in Japan and Europe.”

Luke’s eyebrows went skywards. “Seriously?” At Tony’s affirmation, he nodded, looking stunned, before he remembered something else. “What was Logan talking about with the strange things?”

Tony and Logan simultaneously started grinning again; it was a very unsettling sight. “They’re selling Captain America _sex dolls_.”

Steve’s jaw dropped open. Peter looked like he was about to faint.

“They were very popular when they first came out in the seventies,” Tony supplied helpfully with the expression of a man sharing his wisdom with the uneducated masses. “That was when I didn’t own the rights yet. Don’t worry, there are no more sex dolls with your face on them out there anymore.”

Logan looked up from the cigar he was lighting, shaking his head slightly. “I saw some only a few months back.”

“Really? They still sell those?” Peter tried very hard not to hear the interest in Tony’s voice and not think about where and under what circumstances Wolverine had been to a sex store. He felt his brain protesting wildly as he failed. The only thing making it a little more bearable was the expression of utter denial on Steve’s face combined with his burning red ears.

“Aw, don’t worry, Steve. I’m convinced the real thing’s better than the toy,” Tony said cheerily and patted his lover’s hand on the table.

“Can we change the subject?” Jessica asked, looking utterly bored with the topic.

“Are there Spider-Woman sex dolls out there?” Peter asked jokingly, but regretted it immediately as he got swatted on the arm by his wife and got a very venomous glare from his female counterpart. “Ow! Changing subjects, changing subjects!”

The rest of the evening passed in relative quiet, the only signs of anyone remembering what had been talked about before were Tony’s occasional giggle fits and Steve’s subsequent blush. Still, Tony won at Monopoly and lost when he suggested playing Hotel next. After Jessica lost at Ludo for the third time and declared she wanted off the team for the second, they decided to call it quits. Only MJ and Luke stayed to continue their endless battle of Crazy Eights.

Steve insisted on tidying up the room first, but by the way everyone tried to hide their grin, he only made his teammates aware of his grand plan to only go to bed after Tony had fallen asleep. Stashing the last box into its shelf, he bit his lip. There was no way Tony wouldn’t bring the dolls up again. He might as well go to their bedroom and get it over with.

To his surprise, Tony didn’t mention any sex toys when he came to bed that night. Neither did he mention the sex dolls any time during the next two weeks. It was down in the garage, with Steve still draped half across Tony over the work bench, sticky and sweaty and out of breath, that he heard Tony chuckle again.

“You know, the real thing is definitely better than any Captain America sex doll.”

Steve groaned and kept himself from asking how Tony knew. Because he wasn’t interested in gaining that particular bit of information. He wasn’t.

“Did you actually _try_ one of them?”

**Author's Note:**

> (Originally posted at http://ailette.livejournal.com/29217.html)  
> Beta: As always, thanks to the wonderful freakydarling !  
> A/N: Okay, so I'm not doing anything in the Steve/Tony fandom at the moment. That is mostly because I haven't read the latest Secret Invasion issues and don't want to be spoiled, but also because my S/T muse is failing me at the moment. D: *coughs* Well. So, this is for mjls . Admittedly, I cheated, since I wrote this bit over a month ago, but... I think it fits your prompts. ;)


End file.
